Self Esteem Pamphlet

[MultipleMinds]

**Possible Trigger Warning*

I just read a pamphlet on self esteem and thought I'd share with everyone here.
-Kitt

First off, you should know:
What is self esteem?
- It's your self-image, or how you feel about yourself.

Your self esteem is made up of thoughts and feelings you have about yourself. These can be positive or negative.
Positive self talk can look like, but are not limited to, these examples:
-I'm pretty.
-I'm smart.
-I learn from my mistakes.
-I'm fun.

Negative self talk can look like , but are not limited to, these examples:
-I'm ugly.
-I'm stupid
-I'm afraid to fail.
-I'm boring

The more positive feelings you have about yourself, the HIGHER your self esteem is. The more negative feelings you have about yourself, the LOWER your self esteem is. Some feelings you have about yourself may be difficult to express or explain. This is because you're a unique individual. There's no one else like you in the world. (That' reason enough to be proud of yourself.)

Why should we think about our self esteem?
-Self esteem affects the way you live.
-It affects how you think, act, and feel about yourself AND others.
-It affects how successful you are in achieving your goals in life.

High self esteem can make you feel effective, productive, capable, and lovable. While low self esteem can make you feel ineffective, worthless, useless, incompetent, and unloved. But not to worry, self esteem can be approved. Don't let past failures hold you back. You owe it to yourself to learn to feel good about who you are.

Your level of self esteem is based on the unique experiences and personal relationships that have made up your life. Here's some examples of factors that can influence your self esteem:
-Home

• Relationships with your family, spouse, and friends can affect how you think about yourself. Hanging around negative friends, or having negative/self degrading family members often brings one self esteem down.
• Experiences with your family from birth right up to the present can also affect how you were raised to think and feel.

-School

• Relationships with your classmates, teacher, administrators, and counselors can affect how you view yourself due to other's opinions of you.
• Experiences with school work, extracurricular activities, sports, and discipline can affect how you view your mental and physical aspects of yourself.

 

-Jobs

• Relationships with your supervisors, co-worker, employees, and customers can affect the way you view your success in life.
• Experiences with hiring, firing, promotions, an levels of job responsibility can affect the way you view/handle stress.

-Social life

• Relationships with child-hood and adult friends, neighbors, boyfriends, and girlfriends an affect the way you view and think about yourself due to what others say about you. During teen years especially is when friend's opinions seem to mean the most to you.
• Experiences in clubs, sports teams, and hobbies can affect how you view your ability to interact with others.

-Society

• Relationships with members of different cultures, races, and religions can affect our view of others.
• Experiences with standards, and images created by others can affect us by giving you the illusion of how we're supposed to act.

 

-General

• Positive experiences and fulfilling relationships help raise self esteem. Negative ones tend to lower self esteem.
• No single event or person can determine your level of self esteem. It develops over time, and constantly changing with experiences.

The importance of high self esteem:
Feeling good about yourself enables you to accept challenges. When you have a high self esteem, you're not afraid to develop your abilities. You're willing to risk trying new things. Remember, if you don't try, you can't grow. It helps enrich your life. Happy people are a joy to be around. By being happier with yourself, you'll be egar to meet new friends. By being more comfortable and open about yourself, you'll develop closer relationships. It helps maintain self-confidence. Believing you can do something is half the battle. It allows you to involve yourself completely with whatever you're doing. Whole-hearted effort helps to bring improvement to performance. It also helps you to remain flexible. Change isn't easy. It's unfamiliar and frightening at times. However, a positive self-image makes it easier to accept new ideas and ways of doing things. With high self esteem you can be the person you want to be, enjoy others more fully, and offer more of yourself to the world.

Common effects of low self esteem:
People with low self esteem tend to lack self-confidence. People with low self esteem often have little confidence in their abilities. They may think they're doomed to fail again because they have failed before. Low self esteem can distort view of yourself and others. Some people won't give themselves enough credit for the accomplishments. These people may think others look better in comparison. They may also believe that things just happen to them- that they don't MAKE them happen. It affects your performance. Lack of self-confidence may result in making little or no effort towards realizing projects or goals. But failures that result from a lack of effort are not true reflections of a person's abilities. Low self esteem can also lead to an unhappy/unhealthy personal life. Negative people aren't fun to be around. People with low self esteem find it hard to develop close relationships. The result may be a lonesome and unhappy personal life.

The effects of low self esteem can create a vicious cycle:
Lack of self confidence--> Poor performance-->Distorted view of self and others-->unhappy personal life-->Lack of self-confidence--> ect.

But the cycle can be broken by taking positive steps to raise your self esteem.

Here's a short quiz to take. Most people feel bad about themselves from time t time. So, when answering think about how you feel MOST of the time.

1. Are you easily hurt by criticism?
2. Are you very shy or overly aggressive?
3. Do you try t hide your feelings from others?
4. Do you fear close relationships?
5. Do you try and clam your mistakes on others?
6. Do you find excuses for refusing change?
7. Do you avoid new experiences?
8. Do you continually wish you could change your physical appearance?
9. Are you too modest about personal success?
10. Are you glad when others fail?

If you answered MOST of these questions with 'yes', your self esteem could probably use some improvement.

How to think positively about yourself:
Make a point to be your own best friend. That means giving yourself praise. Take pride in your achievements, both great and small. Remember your experiences are yours alone. Enjoy them! Give yourself encouragement. Take a 'can-do' attitude. Set reasonable timetable for personal goals and offer yourself encouragement along the way. Accept yourself. Identify and accept your strengths and weaknesses. Everyone has them. Help yourself. Set realistic goals. Meet them by learning ne skills and developing your abilities. Give yourself time. Take time out regularly to be alone with your thoughts and feelings. Get involved in activities you can enjoy by yourself, like crafts, reading, or individual sport. Learn to enjoy your own company. Trust yourself. Pay attention to your thoughts and feelings. Act on what you think is right. Do what makes you feel happy and fulfilled. Respect yourself. Don't try to be someone else. B proud of who you are. Explore and appreciate your own special talents. And finally, love yourself. Learn to love the unique person you are. Accept and learn from your mistakes. Don't overreact to errors. Accept your successes and failures, an remember those you love you do.

Is it easy to change self esteem?
NO! It means taking a hard look at yourself, then changing the things you don't like. This takes time, but the results will be worth it. If you've tried but aren't making any progress, consider seeking help.

Does high self esteem guarantee success?
No, but it does guarantee feeling good about yourself and others, no matter what happens.

Can I help others feel better about themselves?
Yes! Let your positive attitudes rub off on others by offering encouragement. Help them open up. Don't put others down. Be patient with their faults and weaknesses.

Does high self esteem mean self-centeredness?
No. It's not egotism or snobbishness. These are usually false fronts for feelings of insecurity and low self esteem. Having high self esteem is appreciating your uniqueness so you can respond to others in a positive and productive way.

Sooooooo.....
Think positively about yourself. Take pride in your individuality.  Praise yourself when you deserve it. Trust your own judgments. Love yourself. Encourage yourself whenever you need it. And help yourself by developing your talents and abilities. You can improve your self esteem.

I hope this all has been as helpful to you as it was to me.
-Kitt